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Back in the thick of it.

January 27, 2016

Are you back in the thick of things?

This can be a hard time of year because we want to feel that fresh start. Yet here we are, still pushing through the same work and juggling all the same pieces of daily life.

It can also be a refreshing time of year. Some people can harness the new year’s energy and then launch into both new and old work with a renewed sense of passion.

If you are working on a project that feels like it just keeps going with no end in sight, then this note is for you. If you are feeling super excited about the year ahead, then consider this note an extra boost!

When you are pushing through work that never seems to end, here are a few things to remember. You have heard these things before. Many wise teachers and dear friends have said these words. But for you, now in the midst of January, I am going to say them again.

Look back at what you have accomplished

You have done many things in your life that are awesome and powerful. You have already done things in your work that are HUGE accomplishments. I know you have. Right now remind yourself of the great things you have done. (I won’t judge if you brag a little.)

Trust yourself

Yes! You actually have the ability to keep going. You have the ability to do this work. You have everything within you that you need. That includes the ability to ask for help and innovate with other folks who would be great work with. You can do this.

Find ways to sustain yourself for the journey

If you are going on a very long road trip, it is a good idea to pack snacks and food. It is also a good idea to pull over and eat that food, get out of the car and look around, move your body a bit, get some sleep, and even ask someone else to drive for a while. Think of your big project like a road trip. Eat, sleep, listen to good music, see the sights, have fabulous conversations – get out of the car sometimes! You will still get where you’re going. And you will enjoy the journey a lot more!

Nothing is forever

“This, too, will pass,” said Persian Sufi poets and lots of other wise people. And it’s true. Everything ends and begins again anew. This current project will be over, this challenging job will end, the kids will grow older. Hold this knowledge, at least just for a second. This moment right now is the moment you have to make the most of. A few moments and blinks later, things will be different.

You’ve got this! Keep going. Look back and congratulate yourself on what you have done. And don’t forget to take a few breaks along the way.

You can even tell me! Feel free to write me a note or post a comment below.

Do you want to commit to finding ways to have a calmer, more connected 2016?

My Room Next Door class begins on February 14th. Choose now to be less stressed next year. Get more info and purchase your seat here.

What is sweet in your life right now?

December 14, 2015

There are a lot of expectations at this time of year. Expectations we place on ourselves, expectations of our loved ones, end of the year expectations of our co-workers. If you are religious, then this time of year can also bring expectations for your spiritual life. Some of these people and their expectations want the best for you: to have a merry time, to feel loved and connected, to experience delight. However, expectations can feel heavy.

For me this year, the expectation to participate in the holiday season and year-end rituals is commingled with the heaviness of my heart.

My heart feels heavy because of all the hate, lack of understanding, and murders that so many communities in our world are facing right now. And I do not want to ignore the complexity of the expectations for the holiday season and the sadness about what is happening to people in my country and in countries far away. So I am not going to. I am going to hold both.

This year as I shop or decorate the house, I am also feeling a mix of delight and sadness.

I am choosing carefully where to invest my time and energy. I am putting my energy into this time of thanksgiving. I am focusing on the upcoming holidays, which are most dear because that’s when I gather with my family. I am lucky to have them.

I work hard to not shut down my heart with the constant barrage of news focused on hate and suffering. I have one technique I am using this year to keep my heart open and remember the essence of this season. At least once a day I take time to remember what is sweet in my life, what I have given to others, and what gifts I have received.

You can do this every day, perhaps right before closing your eyes or as you take the first sip of coffee in the morning.

Close your eyes and ask:

What is sweet in my life right now?
What have I given to someone in my life?
What have I received from someone in my life?

As you answer each question, say thank you. This ritual does not have to be a big thing.

Here are my answers for right now:

What is sweet in my life?
Our home is warm and clean, with a sweet cat and caring neighbors.

What have I given to someone in my life?
I offer a careful listening ear and steadfast commitment to my partner.

What have I received from someone?
My dear friend trekked across the mountains in the snow, bringing her 10-month-old for a visit.

What is a sweetness in your life right now? Post in the comments or on Facebook.

Do you want to commit to finding ways to have a calmer, more connected 2016?

My Room Next Door class begins on February 14th. Choose now to be less stressed next year. Get more info and purchase your seat here.

A bigger reason for living

November 17, 2015

Do you believe you are living for something larger than yourself? I believe most of us are living for a purpose greater than ourselves. You may not have gotten explicit about the big purpose behind what you do every day, but I imagine that you could name many reasons — reasons that are beyond your own needs.

Are you making choices so your children learn how to grow up as loving humans? Perhaps you’re making hard choices so your children can have opportunities and new experiences you did not.
Are you working on a project that will make our communities better places to live, or our schools better places to learn? Are you working for a world where people will have more access to resources, care, and love?
Are you trying to act in a way that causes the people around you to experience a little joy and kindness during their day?

I believe we were put on this spinning planet for a short time in order to give something of ourselves. That “something” does not have to be grand or heroic. If we are all thoughtfully trying and giving in our own sphere of influence, it will matter. The effect will ripple.

Take a moment to get clear. Take a breath. Then ask yourself, “Right now, what bigger reason am I living for?”

Now write down your bigger reason for living.

Think of one way recently you have done your best to live into that bigger purpose. It could be a grant you wrote. A project you are working on with a team. A conversation with your child, your parent, your best friend.

The way you treat someone on the bus today, how you move around people on the sidewalk, how you talk to someone serving you coffee… every action is an opportunity to make a small connection with another human being. A connection that lets the other person know you care, even just a little. And that is living with a bigger reason than yourself.

In the midst of all the violence, occurring in our world and in our backyard, we need this – to connect to our larger purpose.

And here is one more thing: When you see someone trying their best to live out their purpose, see them and say something. You could say, “I see you being an awesome parent, friend, partner.” Or, “I see you working hard for our community.” Say thank you. There are a lot of us trying out here. Let’s remember to keep trying and keep saying thanks.

Here are a few examples of ordinary people, like you and me, living out their bigger purpose – here and here.

This world is rough. It is full of injustice and suffering. In the midst of all the brutal news, we tend to forget our bigger purposes. As we recognize all the ways we fall short as humans, we forget that most of us are working to improve this world.

Remembering our bigger purpose and acknowledging others will allow us to keep expanding our hearts.

How are you living out your bigger purpose? How do you see others living out their bigger purpose?

Post your thoughts in the comments below.
Join the conversation on Facebook.

Do you want to commit to finding ways to have a calmer, more connected 2016?

My Room Next Door class begins on February 14th. Choose now to be less stressed next year. Get more info and purchase your seat here.

Maybe it’s time to start something new

October 29, 2015

I know I often write about de-stressing by taking things off your plate, but maybe it’s time to try something new.

Whoa! If your schedule is packed and you do not know how to fit in one more thing — or you don’t even feel like thinking about new things — this may seem like a very unhelpful suggestion.

Hear me out.

I imagine there is something you’re wanting to try. Something new that you’ve been thinking about, but haven’t shared with anyone. Maybe this new thing does not even require extra time in your schedule.

Trying new things is how we spark and light up. It is how we learn and grow.

New things can make us smile and giggle. New things can make us almost brim over with fear, and then experience the glorious release of saying, “Well, screw it!” and jumping in with both feet.

It’s like trying a bite of an unfamiliar new dessert at the bakery. It can be a sugary surprise and it is almost always worth it.

I am trying something new right now. For the last few months, I have been going to the gym and joining 10 other women of various shapes and sizes in weight lifting and interval training. This is way outside my comfort zone. My notion of myself has never been strong or athletic. Instead, I have seen myself as klutzy and goofy. I am more likely to be found bumping into the corner of a table than I am lifting a weight. Now I put on tight blue pants and running shoes and join the circle of women to receive our marching orders in a smelly gym.

You know that sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach? That’s how I felt as I parked my car in front of the gym for the first two months.

Then WHY in the world am I going?

Here is the reason: I have always wanted to feel a little less clumsy and a little bit stronger. And because something in me was resisting the idea SO fiercely, I knew something in me really wanted to try.

So in a practical sense, this is my new thing right now: This amazing class that is teaching me how to do a burpee. Every time I go, I dread it a little bit less. And I am getting stronger.

But do you want to know what the new thing in my life really is?

It is THINKING about myself differently. I am now trying on this idea that I am a strong woman. A woman who is totally capable of lifting weights and doing wall sits. This is the biggest shift. I have to give myself a talking to almost every class. It goes something like this: “Annie, you are totally capable of doing this. You are doing this! You are strong and you are getting stronger. Get it!”

So I turn back your direction.

What is the new thing you’ve been wanting to try? Is there something you are already doing that is new and scary and out of your comfort zone?

It could be an addition to your life – a new skill or hobby. Or it could just be a new way of thinking about yourself. I bet there is something, if you look closely.

Acknowledge this new thing you are trying on. Maybe you can begin to see yourself in a new light. You can say, “Hey, I am strong. I am capable. I am learning this new skill. I am becoming this kind of person.”

Look yourself squarely in the face. (Really do this. You could even go to a mirror.) And acknowledge the new thing you are trying on – the new person you are becoming.

And if you even want to tell someone about it, do it! Tell someone you love about this new thing that you are living into.

You can even tell me! Feel free to write me a note or post a comment below.

Do you want to commit to finding ways to have a calmer, more connected 2016?

My Room Next Door class begins on February 14th. Choose now to be less stressed next year. Get more info and purchase your seat here.

Is the time you spend, well spent?

September 30, 2015

Sweaters are on and little kids are leaving our building to walk up the hill to school. Last week, my husband Roberto packed up the car and left for his school up north. We have resumed our routine of weekdays apart and weekends together. So far, this year is easier than last, because as with most change, it is easier when you know what to expect.

Last month, I wrote to you about my full plate and the need to decide what to set down and what to pick up. I have been reflecting on this idea and talking to people about it, including a few conversations that came out of my last email letter.

When you are busy – don’t you find it is a bit more complicated than just re-evaluating your life and your time and saying no to a few things in order to make room for more? The advice we all get is to learn to just say no. It has been the advice I have followed and given plenty of times. I tell myself every time I overschedule and I tell my stretched thin clients – “Just take something off your plate.”

Is it really that easy? I don’t think it is. Yes, I should say no to a few more things. But there is a bigger question that wants to be asked, “Why does it seem like my packed calendar does not match what I want from my life or I thought I wanted from this season of my life?”

Before you say “yes” or say “no”, you need to know why. What do you value? What do you want from your life and your time?

Have you ever had a moment where you are not sure if your time matches your priorities, values or dreams? Maybe it is happening right now.

When reflecting on this for myself I came up with a different answer than I expected.

As this busy summer ended I felt like my time had been packed to the gills and I had an uneasy feeling that I was missing something. I had spent my time doing more work with clients than ever before. And more time with my husband and immediate family.

I checked in with myself and asked “Is how I am using my time matching with my priorities and values?”

The knee-jerk reflection was NO! I “should” have had more time this summer swimming in lakes. I missed seeing friends!

Then I reflected further and realized that something else had shifted. Normally, being outside and with friends is what is important to me during the summer. I love my friends! Yet I was delivered two amazing gifts this summer – my business is growing and my husband, who usually does not live in the same town as me, was home all summer. My priorities have changed for the time being. I put my husband, close family and business first. My calendar reflects a change in priorities.

My mind did not catch up and felt like something was left behind. And it was. When your priorities shift, even momentarily, you do have to say good bye to other things. You have to make hard choices.

Maybe this is true for you too. Maybe something in your life has shifted. External circumstances beyond your control can completely change what you need to focus your time on. It can take a while for our brain to catch up with the change.

When you feel like what you spend your time doing is not in line your priorities and values you may begin to feel sick – physically or emotionally. Your body knows when you aren’t living in a way that is true to your core needs or when you have not acknowledged a shift that is happening or needs to happen in your life.

Perhaps, right now you are feeling great about what you do with your days. For the most part, what you spend your time doing matches what you care about and what you want to move forward in your life. If this is the case in your life right now, reflect on that and then CELEBRATE the HECK out of it!

However if, like me, you find that your time is not being spent in a way that matches your values and priorities. The first trick is to notice this. Maybe your priorities have changed. Maybe your time has been overtaken by outside forces.

Here are a few reflection questions to help you figure out if your calendar does not match with your priorities or values and WHY:

Has something in your external world changed?
Has this change brought about a change in your priorities or how you need to spend your time?
Have you changed?
What are you craving from your life now? In the future?
What are the most important things to you right now? The people? The things you want to support?
Does your calendar reflect your priorities, hopes and values?
AND does your calendar have breathing room for you?

It can be hard to look at how we spend our time against what we care about and what our goals are. If we look closely it could mean a major life shift is happening or needs to happen. It could also mean we will need to change behaviors. The tricky thing is if you do not take a look at your priorities and your time, that disconnect can lead to continuous stress and even worse, illness.

If your calendar does not reflect your priorities and values, what are the small changes you can make?

What might be the bigger changes you could examine?

Be gentle and take a look. See if your priorities and time align. What has to shift?

Summer time is fun time — right?

July 29, 2015

This sunny Northwest summer is bringing with it a joyful and frenetic energy, and the last few months have been full!

My husband returned to Seattle after his first year of graduate school in a different city. I’ve been working with clients who are in the midst of major organizational changes. I’ve spent lots of time having fun with loved ones. The events in our nation continue to deliver reminders that the bright sunshine does not slow down hateful acts of violence.

Three forces are pulling me in opposite directions. The extra vitamin D induced energy has me wanting to get big things done and move my work forward. The sweet sunny days with my husband close by have me wanting to lie on a blanket by the water’s edge and read a book. And the local and global news reminds me daily that all things are not equal in this world. I’m aware that my safe, warm sun is not everyone’s experience and that if I want the world to be a kinder place I need to pay attention, learn more, and work for change.

How do you contend with different desires during the same season?

Enjoy where you are in each moment.

I have found myself watching little kids splashing in the waves at the beach, and suddenly thinking: What should we do at that next planning meeting? I have jumped up to write a weekend packing list when I am right in the middle of writing content for my new website.

When I catch myself I say: Whoa, Annie! Where are you right this moment? I breathe deeply, and remind myself: Oh, yes! I have my toes in the sand and there is a sweet three-year-old tossing pebbles with a splash. No need to plan that meeting agenda until Monday.

When you discover that you’ve interrupted one moment with thoughts about your to-dos, take a breath. Remind yourself that this moment matters. You have time.

Big change and big projects do not happen on an exact timeline.

I am great at attaching arbitrary meanings to time, and then deciding that things must be done during that time — or else! I have built quite the robust set of summer projects. And guess what? Not all of them are going to get done this summer! I have already had to reconstruct my plan — more than once.

Yes we need timelines or things can drag on forever. However, overloading yourself with too many plans or unrealistic expectations causes a lot of additional stress. Remember that linear time is a helpful yet arbitrary parameter. It’s OK to reschedule some of your plans and even take a few big projects off your list.

Build time for the most important things.

It’s good to view time as flexible, but we all need schedules. I’ve learned that if I don’t build in specific time for the things that are critical, those things will not get done. My calendar is one of my most important tools!

Put the most important work, projects, and life events on your calendar and attend to them when your calendar tells you to. This applies to exercise, writing time, having dinner with family or friends, or a meeting at work. Setting time on your calendar for important events keeps projects moving forward and makes space for the things you need most. When you build everything in to your calendar it will also help you see visually if you are over doing it. (If you are cut something out.) And yes both of these things are true for me – my calendar helps me get things done AND things need to be flexible.

What about the sad, anger inducing things happening to our communities, here at home and far away?

Hold on to complexity.

I am allowing myself to have complex feelings. I can feel bliss and sadness on the same day. I do not need to run from the bliss because there is so much to be sad about. And I do not need to ignore the sadness because I am afraid it will take away the good feelings. I need both feelings. I can feel both.

Face the news. Keep trying.

When I feel guilty because of the opportunities, rights, and privileges I have, I remind myself that I can do something. To deny myself any joy because of all the harm in the world does no one any good. We need more joy. We need people to feel it and shine it out. At the same time, the guilt and sadness I feel is a reminder to not ignore my desire for the world to be a more equal place.

I remind myself that I am responsible for making that change happen. We all are. For me, taking responsibility means not shutting off the news, not turning away from the difficult conversations. It means examining the work I am doing and how it impacts others in good and negative ways and making changes in how I work.
These are a few of my thoughts on dealing with different wants and desires during this summer season.

How do you contend with different desires in the same season?

Post your thoughts in my comments below.

Joy in your work day

June 22, 2015

Last week I wrote about enjoying your job, even when you’re working super hard. I talked about finding things you like about your work… Things that are fun… Things you do that you have always wanted to do and now you can!

Finding those things and taking time to enjoy them is important. Here is another technique for enjoying your work.

Build some joy into your’ work day.

Your moments of joy do not have to be related to the actual work at hand. Instead, this technique is all about figuring out how to fold a few things you really enjoy into your work day… and then have fun doing those things!

Here are a few examples:

Go for a walk in the middle of the day. Just 10 or 15 minutes — or longer if it’s possible. And enjoy it! You can walk alone or with co-workers. Either way can be fun, depending on the kind of day you are having.

Bring a lunch that you are really excited about eating. Really! Enjoy it.

Bring food to share with your co-workers. This could be cookies or fruit, or anything you enjoy. Share. Experience other people’s joy at having a treat at work. Enjoy their enjoyment!

Pay someone a compliment. Send a card or tell them in person. Say thank you! Then enjoy the moment when they feel joy.

Bring gorgeous summer flowers into your office. Look at them often. Enjoy their colors and intricate details.

Take a moment to ask yourself how you can bring joy and fun into your office space and your work.

Take it a step further: How can you bring this same intention for fun and enjoyment into your home?

What? Work can be fun?

June 15, 2015

A week ago I had a big AHA! moment. Okay, honestly my husband helped me have a big AHA! moment. (Partners can be good at helping us notice things.)

I was busy with work I was super excited about, and I was still talking about it like it was so much “work”. Robbie said to me, “What if you just enjoy this? I mean you love doing this work. What would happen if you thought about it as a fun thing that you get to do instead of more work that you have to do?”

WOW! A revelation! What if I really let myself have fun while I’m doing this project?

Is there something in your day-to-day life that you’re looking at as more work instead of looking at it as a fun opportunity?

If you stop and notice the things you enjoy about your work, you may just have fun.

Try this.

List three things you like about your work. “Work” could mean your job, or parenting, or taking care of a family member.

If you are really hating your current work, that is okay. You do not have to start liking it. But I bet you can find something you can enjoy even in the midst of the crud — that one great customer, supportive co-worker, or important project that you are building.

Take a second right now to name the things you love.

For me the list includes: Being able to witness a client breakthrough. The moment when a group of people has a big idea. Quiet mornings spent writing and reading and researching. Putting together a new curriculum for Room Next Door.

The next time you are doing are super busy with work, slow down a bit and actually enjoy it. Step off the treadmill that says, “You are working! KEEP working!” Instead, try saying, “Look at me! I am doing something I love doing. I am enjoying this. I am good at this.”

Overwhelmed? Stop and get organized!

May 19, 2015

When the list of to-do’s, calls to return, and emails in your inbox is growing at a steady rate, it is easy to get overwhelmed.

When you’re overwhelmed, it feels like there are piles everywhere and you just cannot get ahead of them, no matter what you do. The laundry and dishes pile up. The email threads get lost in digital piles. And looking at the real paper piles on your desk can make you cringe.

It is hard to know what to do next. And it seems like things are never going to be “done.”

What we want to do in times of overwhelm is keep going!
We tell ourselves: Do this one more thing. And then this. And then go over here and do this. Keep going! It will get better if I just keep going!
But it does not get better.

Good news! I have learned a key trick that can help reduce overwhelm within a few hours. You probably know it too. It’s simple — and we almost never do it.

Stop. Get organized!

This is not what we want to do. Looking at all those piles of work increases our anxiety, and we usually want to flee from it. I know I do.

I promise that if you get organized, you will feel better. You may have to push through that first bout of anxiety, but you will feel better! And getting organized improves the chances you will actually accomplish the task you set out to do.

I did this earlier this month.

Right now, I have a number of projects going, including quite a bit of on-site facilitation. At the end of April, I was beginning to wonder how I was going to get it all done.

My first response was to put my head down and just push through. To ignore the piles that were building up around me and simply take care of the next task… and the next… and the next.

I pride myself on being there for my clients. In order to do that, I actually needed to be there for myself first.

So inside of blindly running forward, I set aside an afternoon and evening to get organized. I did not delve into any pending tasks or to-do’s. Instead I cleaned up and fine-tuned my systems.

Here is what I did:

Manage the project and work backwards from deadlines

First I tackled my project management system. I cleaned up the software I use for project management. (I use Asana for business, client and personal projects.) I made sure all my major projects were in the system, with their monthly and weekly tasks. I worked backwards from my deadlines and set completion dates for the key components of each project.

Review daily to-do’s

I use my project management tool and calendar to tell me what needs to happen and when. And I keep track of my daily to-do’s in an actual paper notebook that is always with me. (I know most people are fully digital now – I just cannot give up the great feeling of crossing off tasks on a piece of paper. AND this process allows me to step away from the computer during the day.)Each day I write out two to four to-do’s and/or meetings. If I have more than four to-do’s, I know my project timelines are off and I am not going to get everything done.

Clean up the calendar

I took a look at my calendar and made sure it was “telling the truth.” I reviewed the last few weeks and previewed the weeks coming up. This means that what my calendar says I am doing and what I have planned to do is ACTUALLY what is occurring. When I revisit my calendar, I learn how I am spending my time. That helps me be more realistic about how long it will take me to complete upcoming tasks. I ask myself, “Can I really get this done by then? And what other chunks of time will it take to get this task done?”

Get emails under control

I got back on top of my emails in a few steps. I scanned my email. I responded to anything I could handle quickly. For emails that needed a more thoughtful response, I used Boomerang in Gmail to send messages out of my inbox and back to me at a time when I could focus on them. And I deleted A WHOLE bunch of email, making sure to unsubscribe when pertinent. When I am receiving too much email, I change my email priorities. I respond only to clients, potential clients, friends, and family. I delete the articles and “forwards” in my inbox and start fresh.

Clear the decks

As I worked through this process, I paid attention to tasks that could come off my plate. I asked myself, “What can I move to next month? What can I do a few months from now?” I revised some deadlines in my project management system. I canceled a few appointments. I asked for more help from other people on my team. I decided whether some tasks were truly critical, and whether I needed to do them. I took some tasks off my plate completely. Yes, I actually chose to NOT do some things that were on my to do list.

I know my priorities this month. I have fewer piles. I know what needs to get done. I gave myself permission to let a few things slide for the next five weeks (things like laundry and home-cooked meals).

The whole thing took about four hours. When I was finished organizing, I was tired! And I still felt residual overwhelm.

But the next morning I woke up refreshed! I knew what I needed to tackle and I was no longer avoiding my email or calendar.

This month and the beginning of June are full of good work and good times with my loved ones. I know I will have to stop and get organized again — maybe more than once. I will also need to take an hour at the end of every other day to straighten out my email, my calendar, and my project management system.

If you’re overwhelmed by the work, set aside the time to get your systems in order. When you know what you need to get done, your overwhelm will decrease significantly.

Piles all around you?
Before you do another task, stop and get organized!

“I’m tired of it!” Now what? – THE CHECKLIST: PART TWO

May 12, 2015

Here are a few more ideas to carry with you whenever the work is hard and you’re “TIRED OF IT”. And here is the first half of the checklist of ideas if you missed it.

Reach out for support

We often struggle with asking for help or reaching out when things get tough at work. I am one of those people. I do not like asking for help. I want to be strong and take care of others but I don’t want to be seen needing support. Look at the line of work I am in!

Here’s the deal: People want to help and support us. This is what connects and brings us together. If you are truly tired, exhausted and thinking about throwing in the towel on that project… then that is THE SIGN you need help! You probably need two kinds of help. You need help actually doing the work AND you need some human contact.

First, ask for help with the workload. Talk with a few people you trust. Tell them about what is hard for you right now. Hang out with the humans you love and have fun. If it’s helpful, ask for check-ins and accountability. (Remember, we almost always CAN ask for help, but we usually DON’T!)

Remember a time when you got through it

We have all worked hard, pushed through and accomplished things we did not think were possible at the time. Find some examples in your past. Make a list — on paper or in your mind — of five times you have worked through something very hard. Be mindful of these times. What did you do? How did you feel? You are capable of working through this tough time. Remind yourself.

Work differently

There is always a new way to work. You can do things differently now. Once we have been working on something for a while, we begin to only see one way for things to happen. This is one of the most dangerous traits we have as humans: Our inability to see that there is a different way to do what we have been doing. If something is not working or if it is incredibly tiresome, try doing it a different way.

Sometimes we are stuck and we need others to help unstick us. Get together with a group of people and talk through fresh options. Pick people you want to talk with, people who will listen. And remember to let them know you are looking for ideas, not answers. You still get to decide what you are going to do. Imagine a change. Get creative. Build a plan.

Get “gritty”

Remember, as human beings we have the ability to do a lot more than we think we can. We see examples of this all the time in sports stories or survival stories. People can get through a lot when they need to. You can, too.

Dig in a little deeper. When you think you have reached your limit and you cannot do any more, try stretching even further. That is when you’ll begin to find out what you are made of. You have guts and abilities you never even knew about.

Take good care of yourself. Get support. And then put your back into it! Tell yourself you can do this. Then keep doing it. You are much stronger than you think.

You’ve got this. And when the work is done, you are going to feel good!

Are you back in the thick of things?

Look back at what you have accomplished

Trust yourself

Find ways to sustain yourself for the journey

Nothing is forever

For me this year, the expectation to participate in the holiday season and year-end rituals is commingled with the heaviness of my heart.

What is sweet in my life right now? What have I given to someone in my life? What have I received from someone in my life?

I believe we were put on this spinning planet for a short time in order to give something of ourselves. That “something” does not have to be grand or heroic. If we are all thoughtfully trying and giving in our own sphere of influence, it will matter. The effect will ripple.

Remembering our bigger purpose and acknowledging others will allow us to keep expanding our hearts.

Trying new things is how we spark and light up. It is how we learn and grow.

Then WHY in the world am I going?

But do you want to know what the new thing in my life really is?

What is the new thing you’ve been wanting to try? Is there something you are already doing that is new and scary and out of your comfort zone?

Before you say “yes” or say “no”, you need to know why. What do you value? What do you want from your life and your time?

Here are a few reflection questions to help you figure out if your calendar does not match with your priorities or values and WHY:

If your calendar does not reflect your priorities and values, what are the small changes you can make?

What might be the bigger changes you could examine?

Be gentle and take a look. See if your priorities and time align. What has to shift?

How do you contend with different desires during the same season?

Enjoy where you are in each moment.

Big change and big projects do not happen on an exact timeline.

Build time for the most important things.

What about the sad, anger inducing things happening to our communities, here at home and far away?

Hold on to complexity.

Face the news. Keep trying.

Build some joy into your’ work day.

Take a moment to ask yourself how you can bring joy and fun into your office space and your work.

Take it a step further: How can you bring this same intention for fun and enjoyment into your home?

Is there something in your day-to-day life that you’re looking at as more work instead of looking at it as a fun opportunity?

Take a second right now to name the things you love.

Stop. Get organized!

Here is what I did:

Manage the project and work backwards from deadlines

Review daily to-do’s

Clean up the calendar

Get emails under control

Clear the decks

If you’re overwhelmed by the work, set aside the time to get your systems in order. When you know what you need to get done, your overwhelm will decrease significantly.

Reach out for support

Remember a time when you got through it

Work differently

Get “gritty”

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What is sweet in my life right now?
What have I given to someone in my life?
What have I received from someone in my life?