I feel sadness and worry, anger and fear as a new war begins, and the rights of trans kids and families, LGBTQ+ people and communities, and women are under attack.

When is it going to end?

“It” isn’t going to end. We must continue to get better at being in “it” and responding with peace, courage, resolve, resilience, joy, and outrage.

We need to maintain nourishing waters within.

You will need to keep your internal stores up to stay awake to others, your team, your responsibilities, and the struggle, traumas, and injustice around us.

What do I mean?

You have an internal storehouse of energy to draw from, and it needs reserves. You need to know you have the vitality to respond to your basic needs and solve problems. 

If subconsciously you know that you do not have enough energy to keep yourself and others needs plus your work afloat – parts of you will shut down. Your body and mind will shut parts of your operating system down to conserve the little energy you have left. The components that stop working well can include the part of you that can respond to the needs of others. And the parts of you that can vision, imagine, hope, and problem solve.

You may stop listening to the joys and pains of others when you feel parched.

You could stop listening to the joys of your life and the needs of yourself when you feel depleted.

Your strength is always in you. 

However, access is blocked.

Getting depleted can happen in two simple ways:

• Not enough nourishment is coming into your system. 
• There is a great strain on your being that is causing lots of output. 

There are two ways to enrich your soil, fill up your cup, and increase your stores.

Nourish your system.

Decrease the strain on your system.

It is simple and requires self-awareness, outside support, and letting go.

Use the check-in tool of “Tending, Tuning In, Checking In, & Changing” to find out what you can do to keep your energy flowing.

Please – so many of us are running on empty. Dear friend – take a moment to check in and give yourself what you need to restore. You are needed for the long haul. This journey is not over. However, we cannot keep going on empty.

Download this check-in tool here!

A note about decreasing the strain on your system:

There are times when you cannot do anything about what is straining you. These could be moments when tremendous caretaking of others is needed. Times of urgent, necessary deadlines. Times of significant change. Times of loss. Times of violence and trauma.

In these straining moments, you do the best you can do. You ask for support. And find the easiest, minimal ways to take care. You hold on. And give yourself as much love, space, and grace as possible.

P.S.
I wanted to share a poem and essay with you. My partner & beloved Roberto Ascalon was asked to re-imagine Seattle. It is a reminder of all we are experiencing in this time –loss, politics, the pandemic, racial reckonings, injustice, love. Also, it is a glimpse into our small family life during this big moment in time.

A few places you can take action and take care:

Grief practices From Valerie Kaur
Donate to Ukraine (from Valerie Kaur)
Support LGBTQ rights – ACLU, Human Rights Campaign